Monday, 24 November 2008

The joys of parenthood!

You have to love being a parent when you've dozed off on the sofa and are woken by your child screaming. It's a labour of love for any parent and annoying as it is, we are always running to be there when our children need us.

Well, tonight I was woken up by Aston calling out to me so I sprung from the sofa and limped up the stairs as fast as I could (I'm currently suffering with heel and calf pain in my left leg) and called out "I'm coming!" and then "What's the matter?" to which the reply was "Nosebleed Mummy". And low and behold, he's standing at the door, holding on to the baby gate for dear life, with blood all over his face and down the front of his pyjamas. On further examination with the light on, there was a huge pool of blood on his pillow that had soaked through one of his bubbies (muslins to the rest of us!), the pillow case and into the pillow. He was in a terrible panic about it and desperate to get the blood off his hands and face and terribly worried that he'd made a mess of his pyjamas. So I've now spent about 45 minutes sorting him and his bed out and have donated a pillow from my bed to stick under his one remaining, sorrowful looking pillow and I have the washing machine going in a vain attempt to remove the blood stains from all the linen before it gets too deep into the fibres.

Now I'm off to bed. I'm bloomin' knackered! My own fault as I was up until about 4am yesterday finishing off my Xmas swap item for the Lets Knit forum Secret Santa. Quite chuffed with it though I can't put a piccie up yet in case it's seen by the intended recipient. So you'll all have to wait to see it.

Nighty night all!

Friday, 21 November 2008

My life sucks and I want a cigarette!

I haven't smoked for months and now I just want a fag more than anything. This bad day has just got worse and now it's hit rock bottom. Why aren't corner shops open after 10pm? I can't go all the way to Tescos for a pack of ciggies. It's so bloody frustrating!

I should have known really when the day didn't start off well. I woke up having dreamt that my ex, Sefton, hadn't just dumped me and wanted a divorce, he'd got back together with his ex-wife and found out he had a child with her who he loved more than our son Aston because this other boy was blond haired and blue eyed like he wanted Aston to be and Aston has brown eyes. Consequently, I woke up feeling totally miserable and got Aston out of bed only to have him come over and stroke my arm and say "It's alright Mummy" cuz I was sitting with tears rolling down my face.

I've felt pretty spaced out all day (I did yesterday too) and I have no idea what's causing it. I suppose I should have known better than to text Sefton and tell him that I still love him and I miss him and could we talk about things. I should have left well alone, for my own sanity. But in my usual inimitable style, I made a total balls up of my life so why would I start to do things differently now. I sent him another text this evening saying that as I hadn't had a reply, I assumed that he was either ignoring me, confused or feels nothing. And then I do get a reply saying 'I feel nothing it's over i have moved on with my life' and 'sorry not interested stop sending me texts like that' and that just broke me.

I just wish he'd tell me the real reason our marriage broke down so I know if it's a problem I need to assess or not. I wanna know if he blames me or not. Maybe then, I'll be able to move on.

If I didn't have a beautiful, loving son to take care of, I'd have emptied my medicine cabinet down my throat by now.

(Don't worry, I'll be fine in the morning! Honest!)

Wednesday, 19 November 2008

Scarf for the Sheerness Clock Tower and Library Exhibition

The knitting group has maintained it's local celebrity status of late as you can see! Not only have we got an exhibition on at the Library in Sheerness, but there has been a lot of interest in making the squares for use in the scarf for the clock tower. We've even got council support for it! Hopefully there'll be some more coverage in the local paper when we actually get to put the scarf up on 13th December!

Tuesday, 4 November 2008

An overdue update from the land of Swampy!

Where have I been you may wonder... well, I've been here all the time, just haven't got round to posting in ages!

Here are a few of my 'makes' since my last posting...

Halloween spider decoration (crocheted)

Teddy Bear (from Linnypin Designs 'Austin' pattern) for Name the Bear comp

Raymond Briggs's Snowman (pattern by Alan Dart) for Aston's Xmas present

Squares for the Clock Tower scarf (good job I'm not the only one doing them as I've only managed to make 2!)

About Me

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I'm a stay at home mum (yes it IS a non-profit industry - I've never had a penny for doing it and I don't know any mums who have!) to Aston who's 2 years old. I have 2 pet rabbits - Malcolm and Jimmy. I'm seperated from my husband and now live back in my hometown of Sheerness, Isle of Sheppey, Kent UK. I have also lived in London and West Sussex so I've knocked about the South East of England a bit! I'm a pagan and am inspired by natural things and love anything that's not been tampered with too much. I love watching rugby and football and my fave teams are Bath Rugby (cuz Matt Stevens plays for them! lol) and Fulham FC.